The answer to your funk is right there....healthy family, decent job, nice house. A near death experience with massive blood clots, my husband’s leukemia diagnosis, a surgical error that resulted in a need for another surgery and four total joint replacements being put on the back burner because of high risk have taught me to be grateful and press on. It’s hard to walk, I can’t drive...but I try to put a smile on my face and appreciate what I do have. Wish I could do more to help others but feeling sunshine on my face and being with family and friends is precious. I wasn’t smiling though when they canceled the Big 10 tourney and NCAA’s!
Completely self loathing
- Thread starter sunshinedynomite
- Start date
It must be difficult for even high end prostitutes to charge top dollar for services rendered from the recommended social distance.
We were married 37 years. We met in 7th grade. Our sons are 36 and 38.
Dude, that's my new favorite gif.
Great character, great actor.
Geez, sorry you're going through this. A few thoughts:
First, it takes real courage and character to admit to feelings like that and ask for help.
Second, you're not alone. Far from it. It's been said that everyone we meet is fighting a battle we know nothing about. Sometimes the hardest of those battles take place in people we would never imagine to be fighting them.
Third, there are some excellent practical suggestions offered by various others in the thread.
Fourth, if you've been feeling this way for a good while, to the point you don't even want to get out of bed in the morning, then it may be time to consider professional intervention. Clinical depression, if that's what you're suffering from, is a fairly common and crippling condition -- but very often treatable.
Fifth, I will say a prayer for you today which may not help...but definitely won't hurt!
Hang in there, man.
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anon_1eeb2b426hv3y
Guest
Heartbreaking. I’m glad they had her for 36 and 38 years and that you knew her so long. Still heartbreaking. So sorry for your loss. Hang in there. I hope you and your boys can be and remain close.
Well, it was 28 and 26 when she passed. The thing I am thankful for is that until the boys reached junior high, she was a stay at home mom. I don't know about everyone else here...but when I fell in love, the last thing I thought about was what kind of mother she would be. Turns out it was like this was her calling in life.There are many things that should be obvious, but for some reason are not....like mom is the planner and the agenda setter for the family. Holidays, birthdays, vacations......none of them are really joyous without her. No one has to say anything, the most important person is missing. Since 2009, I have not celebrated Christmas.....she made it impossible to emulate. So, we go to every PSU Bowl Game and I pay the way as a present. We picked other bowls when PSU was on probation. This has given me the opportunity to provide different types of memories and my own spin on the holidays. Life can be a special kind of lonely. When you love someone that you will never see again. You can be in a crowd of friends, but you arrive alone and you know you will leave the same way. I was so much better because of her.
Our local bank is having a run on cash withdrawls. The girls will need to start taking Visa.It must be difficult for even high end prostitutes to charge top dollar for services rendered from the recommended social distance.
Sun is shining and good thoughts by good people.
Thanks all for sharing.
I love the positive vibes from this board.
I am making a commitment to being a better human to all people.
maybe a silver lining with all this chaos
Thanks all for sharing.
I love the positive vibes from this board.
I am making a commitment to being a better human to all people.
maybe a silver lining with all this chaos
I suggest rubber....gloves and tongsThe good ones have the scan and go 3D Barcode Tattoo "down there"...
Well here goes. I have surgery scheduled next week and will have to be hospitalized for a few days. It supposed to be routine and laparoscopic but if they find something unexpected, who knows. I have a very compromised immune system, and other health problems. I’m worried about my wife visiting as we are both in the high risk age. At least I’ll be in a sterile room while I recover. My brother in law in Arizona is about to go into hospice care. He probably only has about a week left and because of the virus we will be unable to fly out for a funeral. My daughter wanted to visit me last weekend while on spring break (she’s a millennial ) but was afraid of bringing an infection into the house so she stayed home. So we face time every day instead.
So yeah, life is a bitch right now. I wonder when I’ll be able to go out and interact normally with people again without a fear of dying.
So yeah, life is a bitch right now. I wonder when I’ll be able to go out and interact normally with people again without a fear of dying.
I work in a pretty large hospital complex. They are canceling pretty much all elective cases. Especially cases where people are compromised or have co-morbidities. Not saying that will happen to your case Nit, but keep closer in touch your the docs and hospital than you usually do. Hospital visitation is also being limited. Check up on this too. These things are probably day to day everywhere.
I've been dealing with a pending loss of employment during this bullshit but I made a crazy hail-mary play yesterday that will allow me to continue to work from home as I have the last year and continue to earn a pay check and health insurance during this crisis.
Bold and decisive action just saved my ass!
It's been hell the last 2-3 weeks but at least I have one existential crisis handled. Don't worry, I still hate myself.
Bold and decisive action just saved my ass!
It's been hell the last 2-3 weeks but at least I have one existential crisis handled. Don't worry, I still hate myself.
My surgeon at Penn called me today to see if I wanted to proceed. He said he didn’t see any particular risk and that my single room was probably more sterile than anywhere else. It’s not life threatening but it’s something I need to have done and from a health standpoint, the sooner the better. I should be able to do this without any exposure to the virus. I told him let’s do it now because I fear that the longer I wait the more difficult it might be to get into the hospital. If all goes as planned I’ll be home in 2-3 days, next Thursday or Friday. So now I’m scheduled for next Tuesday afternoon and it should be laparoscopic. I’ll be able to complete my recovery in the safety of my home and stay indoors here. But I am concerned. I just want it over.
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anon_xdc8rmuek44eq
Guest
The way he worded it with days first, then months, then years made it seem like it just happened on first glance. Hope he and others continue to hang in there like you say - don't let the world win.
Depression is monster; I've struggled with it since I was a teenager, so I've walked some similar roads to those talked about here. There is a lot of great advice in this thread - staying busying and exercise are two of the best things anyone struggling can do for themselves. Not specifically directed at the OP, but there are other things that have helped me. I'm very analytical, so Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT) was life changing for me. I had a few sessions with a person who trained me in the techniques, and I use it in some form regularly. Feelings are often liars. Everything feels bad and everything sucks when you're depressed. The "I don't want to do anything, and I don't like doing anything" thoughts/feelings is depression lying to you. I've buried my dad, my best friend, and my father-in-law. I lost my mentor and one of my personal heroes to dementia. Throw in a bout with cancer that cost me a kidney, and you have no argument from me that life can be miserable. That said, you get up everyone morning, take care of yourself, and look for opportunities to make the lives of others a little easier. Even the depression monster will have a hard time overcoming that.
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anon_1eeb2b426hv3y
Guest
Yeah, I learned that from his response. Definitely seemed like it happened more recently at first read but wasn’t going to address the distinction since it doesn’t matter. I don’t feel less badly for the guy because the nightmare began longer ago.
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