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Happy Engineer's Day!

psuro

Well-Known Member
Aug 24, 2001
63,226
41,400
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The corner table at the Skellar
s-l400.jpg
 
Was at they eye doctor. they do the thing where they put the lenses in front of you and ask which one is better/more clear, one or two. anyway, it wasn't going the greatest as I guess I was not going fast enough and contradicting myself sometimes and saying that they both were the same, etc....The optometrist finally sort of stopped, took a breath, and then asked if I was an engineer. I said 'yes'. She smiled and said she figured as engineers are the worst people for optometrists as they never do well in the one or two as they always over analyze everything.
 
BS IE '88

My Dad has BS & MS in Chemistry from Notre Dame. He loves to tell this joke about differences between engineers and scientists...

One day a biologist, chemist, and a physicist are standing around a flag pole. An engineer walks up and asks "what are you all doing"... "Trying to figure out the height of this flagpole" says the biologist. The engineer unscrews the flagpole, lays it down, and measures it to 25 feet. The chemist says, "Just like an engineer... we want the height, he gives us the length".
 
The optimist says the glass is half full.

The pessimist says the glass is half empty.

The engineer says it’s the wrong glass.
And the corollary:

“To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
- Unknown
 
To all my fellow nerds.....it's our day! Break out the protractors and the mechanical pencils and go design something!

i Also belong to the "Order of the Engineer"
iu


Order of the Engineer:
The Order of the Engineer is an association for graduate and professional engineers in the United States that emphasizes pride and responsibility in the engineering profession. Wikipedia

The Obligation of the Order of the Engineer is similar to the Canadian “Ritual of the Calling of an Engineer” initiated there in 1926. It uses a wrought iron ring, conducts a secret ceremony, and administers an oath authored by Rudyard Kipling.
I am an Engineer. In my profession, I take deep pride. To it, I owe solemn obligations.

As an engineer, I pledge to practice integrity and fair dealing, tolerance and respect, and to uphold devotion to the standards and dignity of my profession. I will always be conscious that my skill carries with it the obligation to serve humanity by making the best use of the Earth's precious wealth.

As an engineer, I shall participate in none but honest enterprises. When needed, my skill and knowledge shall be given, without reservation, for the public good. In the performance of duty, and in fidelity to my profession, I shall give my utmost.

— "Obligation of an Engineer"


The Engineer in Hell

An engineer dies and goes to Hell.
He’s talking with Satan and says, “What a terrible place! It’s very hot, dark, smoky and extremely bad!”

Satan said, “Well, what did you expect? After all, this IS Hell!”
The engineer said, “Do you have a compressor, some tubing, and wire?

Satan said, “Yeah, we might have some of that stuff laying around somewhere. I’ll check and see what I can find for you.”

Satan finds the stuff. So, the engineer starts designing and building improvements. After a while, Hell has air conditioning, iced water, good lighting, flush toilets, and escalators. The engineer is a pretty popular guy!

One day God calls and tells Satan, “Say, we had a mix-up. I was checking records and discovered that by error an engineer got sent down to you. He should have come here in Heaven. All engineers go to Heaven. You need to transfer him up here instead.”

Satan says, "Why, things are going great. We've now got air conditioning, iced water, flush toilets, great lighting, and escalators, and there's no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next. We like him! We’re going to keep him.”

God is horrified. "That's clearly a mistake! He should never have gone down there in the first place! Send him up here immediately!"

Satan says, "No way! I really like having an engineer on the staff. I'm keeping him.”

God says, “Send him back up here or I'll sue you!” Satan laughs, “Yeah, right, God. Good luck on that. Where are you going to find a lawyer?!"​
 
i Also belong to the "Order of the Engineer"
iu


Order of the Engineer:
The Order of the Engineer is an association for graduate and professional engineers in the United States that emphasizes pride and responsibility in the engineering profession. Wikipedia

The Obligation of the Order of the Engineer is similar to the Canadian “Ritual of the Calling of an Engineer” initiated there in 1926. It uses a wrought iron ring, conducts a secret ceremony, and administers an oath authored by Rudyard Kipling.
I am an Engineer. In my profession, I take deep pride. To it, I owe solemn obligations.

As an engineer, I pledge to practice integrity and fair dealing, tolerance and respect, and to uphold devotion to the standards and dignity of my profession. I will always be conscious that my skill carries with it the obligation to serve humanity by making the best use of the Earth's precious wealth.

As an engineer, I shall participate in none but honest enterprises. When needed, my skill and knowledge shall be given, without reservation, for the public good. In the performance of duty, and in fidelity to my profession, I shall give my utmost.

— "Obligation of an Engineer"


The Engineer in Hell

An engineer dies and goes to Hell.
He’s talking with Satan and says, “What a terrible place! It’s very hot, dark, smoky and extremely bad!”

Satan said, “Well, what did you expect? After all, this IS Hell!”
The engineer said, “Do you have a compressor, some tubing, and wire?

Satan said, “Yeah, we might have some of that stuff laying around somewhere. I’ll check and see what I can find for you.”

Satan finds the stuff. So, the engineer starts designing and building improvements. After a while, Hell has air conditioning, iced water, good lighting, flush toilets, and escalators. The engineer is a pretty popular guy!

One day God calls and tells Satan, “Say, we had a mix-up. I was checking records and discovered that by error an engineer got sent down to you. He should have come here in Heaven. All engineers go to Heaven. You need to transfer him up here instead.”

Satan says, "Why, things are going great. We've now got air conditioning, iced water, flush toilets, great lighting, and escalators, and there's no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next. We like him! We’re going to keep him.”

God is horrified. "That's clearly a mistake! He should never have gone down there in the first place! Send him up here immediately!"

Satan says, "No way! I really like having an engineer on the staff. I'm keeping him.”

God says, “Send him back up here or I'll sue you!” Satan laughs, “Yeah, right, God. Good luck on that. Where are you going to find a lawyer?!"​
I have a pinky ring somewhere too Step
 
A United States Office of Education training film🤓


Growing up, my father taught us how to use a slide rule. Being a mathematical atheist, I have long since forgotten how to use one. We also had a mechanical calculator similar to this one that my dad used to use all the time, including to do his taxes as electric calculators were too expensive at the time. I do remember his first electric calculator, which was a black beast from Radio Shack that he named Moses.



There was a retired math professor from Bucknell that lived next to us and he had a collection of old calculating devices, including a slide rule from the Soviet Union that was round, about the size of a pocket watch.
 
Was at they eye doctor. they do the thing where they put the lenses in front of you and ask which one is better/more clear, one or two. anyway, it wasn't going the greatest as I guess I was not going fast enough and contradicting myself sometimes and saying that they both were the same, etc....The optometrist finally sort of stopped, took a breath, and then asked if I was an engineer. I said 'yes'. She smiled and said she figured as engineers are the worst people for optometrists as they never do well in the one or two as they always over analyze everything.
You can always tell an engineer, but you can't tell them much.
 
To all my fellow nerds.....it's our day! Break out the protractors and the mechanical pencils and go design something!

From a business guy .. enjoy your day.
As a dad of a COVID class of 2020 December PSU Mechanical Engineering grad who is still beating the bushes hard for a job, any leads or new ideas appreciated.
 
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